#FWF: Free Write Friday: Image Prompt

This week Kellie Ellmore’s Free Write Friday Challenge asks us to be inspired by this image prompt.

After this contribution I’ll be taking a couple of weeks off to focus on my wedding and family.

See you soon … and enjoy!

Dorothy 🙂

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Yet …

It doesn’t exist yet

Except in my heart

A place I hold dear

But have not as yet

Met. My dream;

My desire awaits

As everything unfolds

As it should.

Question not the time,

Nor place, just feel it

And the wholeness

It brings when

Finally it appears before

Me. Rejoice in the fullness

Of Spirit manifested

As we recognize each

Other and at last I

announce

“I’m home.”

*

Copyright Aimwell CreativeWorks 2013

#FWF: Free Write Friday ~ The Illusion

This week’s Free Write Friday exercise from Kellie Elmore asks us to use this image as a prompt.

Here we go …

But for tethered wings, I could fly.

But for a caged spirit, I could soar.

Release!

Sever the strings that bind me

To the Earth!

Unlock the door that imprisons

My weary soul! ~

Awaken me from the illusion

That I need more than I am

To soar.

*

Thanks for visiting …

Dorothy 🙂

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Copyright Aimwell CreativeWorks 2013

#FWF Free Write Friday: Baggage Claim …

Another submission to Kellie Elmore’s Free Write Friday. This week the subject is “Baggage Claim.”

I’m enjoying this opportunity to do some free thinking based on a prompt. Sometimes I find it difficult to express myself — like there’s still some kind of  blockage in the frequency between the expression of my heart and my mind, the critic.

Still, with every word I write I know the air waves are clearing. I can hardly wait to write in Dolby! 🙂

Herewith my take on Baggage Claim.

Enjoy!

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Around and around the carousel of my life you

Spun my head in a million different

Ways I could not fathom until I finally

Took courage and claimed you.

What then?

But to open you, of course, and watch

With, tortured amusement, your

Contents spill over in an untidy

Mind-boggling mess.

Where would I start?

How to sort through the dirty

Raiment of my past without

Feeling overwhelmed by the

Volume of it all?

Did this really happen to me?

Did that really colour every decision,

Every relationship?

Soiled and rendered useless I

Toss you to the laundry pile and,

As time passes, cleanse you from

My soul. For, I shall not carry your

Burden any longer.

Be gone.

I shall not seek you

In Lost Luggage.

*

Thanks for visiting …

Dorothy 🙂

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Copyright Aimwell CreativeWorks 2013

I Am

The Shadow’s my companion, but it is not who I am.

Through the process of healing, together we walk.

A light shines on our mutual pain; the pain is defused.

Revealed for what it is, the dark place begins to lose its power.

It no longer overwhelms.

The victim is no more.

With this release a voice of strength emerges, but no longer asks:

“Why me?”

It is simply enough to know that

I am.

*

Thanks for visiting …

Dorothy 🙂

*

Copyright Aimwell CreativeWorks 2013

A Struggle With Visibility

Still more on the personal journey …

I’ve made no secret of the fact I’m in therapy. I hit the proverbial wall a few years ago and at the time, feeling depressed, stuck, fatigued and hopeless, decided if I really wanted to move beyond it I had to figure out how to get out of my own way. So, I put myself in therapy.

Every week the light shines a little deeper into my personal abyss.

This week’s session was another exercise in moving beyond trauma. My awareness shifted once again as I learned to understand my life’s main coping mechanism … invisibility.

“When I’m invisible no one can hurt me.”

Acting on this belief is how I’ve managed to survive. The trouble with this way of being, however, is that it cuts me off from the world around me. I’ve rarely been really present in my experiences and have found it difficult to recognize or accept honest help when it’s offered. A lot of this has boiled down to my inability to trust.

As a result, I have almost no memory of my early years and spotty recognition of times after that. What resonates are the vibrations of traumatic childhood experiences that have conditioned my responses as an adult.

This is what I am seeking to understand and change through therapy. I still have a lot of life left and it no longer serves me to live invisiblly.

My horse is an important part of my journey to wholeness. His power and size mean I must be present when interacting with him. But I must first be there … here … present … for myself. In no uncertain terms Bear teaches me to do this every day.

I need, and want, to be visible but the thought of it, at times, still terrifies me. It is this ongoing battle between the new self-awareness and the old “comfortable” way of being that brings on such great fatigue. And as I prepare, now, to be front and centre on my upcoming wedding day these feelings only seem to become more entrenched and argumentative.

Yet I am determined to see the battle through, rejoice in my visibility, and continue to walk the healing path so my creative spirit can come shining through.

Putting these feelings into words in this blog is part of my healing.

Allowing the words to flow to you by pressing the “Publish” button is part of the challenge.

My finger is inevitably poised over the delete key …

… but not this time.

*

Lost Years

Release the fears,

And all the tears

Wept for the lost

And lonely years.

Be not afraid

Just let them go.

Plant new the seed

And watch it grow

In strength and love

Toward the light,

The shadow’s power

No more in sight.

And be that light

That wants to shine.

It is your turn,

Oh child, mine.

*

Thanks for visiting …

Dorothy

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Copyright Aimwell CreativeWorks 2013 
All Right Reserved

Milestone Fifty

Fifty years ago today, in a hospital in Vancouver, British Columbia, at 3:41 p.m. Pacific Standard Time, I drew my first breath.

Seems odd that already a half century has gone by. Still, this does not depress me. I’ve been engaged enough in self-awareness exercises during the past several years to realize that my life is, in fact, just beginning.

I still have dreams and things I’d like to accomplish.

Sometimes I wonder, “Am I too old?”

No.

Age is more than a number. It’s everything behind it that has made me who I am.

So it is with gratitude and a burning desire to fulfill my measure here on Earth that I continue boldly along the path of my life.

Thank you for being a part of my journey …

Be well,

Dorothy 🙂

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Milestone Fifty

Stand I now by Milestone Fifty.

Could be nasty; could be nifty.

Could depress me; make me cry.

Could hang my head with a heavy sigh.

Could devour my tender heart,

Yet that’s not how I wish to start

The waning years that fly so fast,

Engage, I must, to the very last

Inspired breath I dare to take

And gasp I give, for goodness sake.

For age is more than just a number

Can give us strength and fill with wonder.

Clouds with silver lining weep

For those who to their golden years creep.

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Copyright Aimwell CreativeWorks 2012

Wake Up!

Most of my recent poetry is about the journey to Self-Awareness.

For a long time I lived the debilitating, fearful, exhausting life of the victim and survivor.

A series of wake-up calls over several years gently nudged me into a new reality, telling me there was more to life than had been my illusion.

So, one day I finally pulled up my socks, strapped on some sturdy shoes, reached deep inside to locate whatever remained of trust and started, with help, down the road to
my truth and personal freedom.

And what a journey it has been so far …

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Wake Up!

For many years I had no choice,

I only heard another’s voice.

Another’s thoughts had formed my world;

Into their fetid vortex hurled.

Flailing, fighting every day

I tried to live in my own way,

But had no strength to be myself,

So sat, invisible, ‘pon the shelf.

And then, one day, awoke, did I,

To who I’d been, did say “Bye bye!”

Flung out the detritus of life;

Sub-conscious sources of toil and strife.

De-hypnotized old patterns deep,

To climb a learning curve so steep …

Just who am I? Why am I here?

Deep questions full of faith and fear.

But ask I must, and answer, too,

If I to my own self be true.

*

Thanks for visiting.

Dorothy 🙂

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Copyright Aimwell CreativeWorks 2012